jem on jém

[JOURNAL-ENTRY-025]

terminal\user\jem\journal

Another entry, another round of thinking there aren’t a lot of words. Not indicative of a mundane week, when I spent the majority of it with family and, once returned home, with friends old and new.

I’m also a day late once more. Starting on the first of the month scratches an itch for the obsessive janitor in my brain, but creates a new mess in breaking an established order I’ve long tried hard to maintain – but even that’s not entirely true.

I like to think that, rather than one crack in the many to come that will eventually lead to the flood in my house, these oversights, lapses in judgment, gaps in my knowledge, and things left too late are things to learn from. Not punishments justified in their varying levels of consequences, but tests, equivalent to a pop quiz or a random drug test or whatever.

Maybe that’s naivete, undying optimism, huffing the copium as it were. But I’m reminded of this quote:

You tell me it's a cruel world and we're all running around in circles. I know that. I've been on this earth just as many days as you.
…
When I choose to see the good side of things, I'm not being naive. It is strategic and necessary. It's how I've learned to survive through everything.
…
I know you see yourself as a fighter. Well, I see myself as one too. This is how I fight

There’s no winning or losing here, no stakes or prizes to be one. There’s just living. In the rain while walking a dog, on a Minecraft server with 300 mods or a board game night where I win Farkle first try.